


A Fathers Loss

by PrettyLittlePuppet



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Depression, Gen, Sadstuck, Wakes & Funerals
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-01-25
Updated: 2013-01-25
Packaged: 2017-11-26 19:25:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,327
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/653618
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PrettyLittlePuppet/pseuds/PrettyLittlePuppet
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>I've been wanting to write something fir a while so i found this random prompt: Write about a funeral....enjoy</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Fathers Loss

James never thought it would come to this. He was currently shuffling around his room slowly. He didn't really want to go through with this but it had to be done. He combed his hair back, replaced his usual white fedora with a black one and picked up the tie sitting on top his dresser. He stared blankly into the mirror in front of him as he slowly tied the strip of black cloth around the collar of his dull black shirt. After he was finished he fixed the collar and turned away from the mirror, picking up the neatly pressed suit jacket from his bed and slipping it on. He sat down heavily on his bed and sluggishly made work of putting his shoes on, sitting up after words, uncharacteristically slouching a little as he checked the watch on his wrist. Sighing he pulled himself up onto his feet and dragged his feet as he made his way out of his room, picking up his keys from the dish near the door and made his way to the car. 

He didn't even notice that he had driven straight to the funeral home until he had pulled into a parking spot in front of the white bricked, black roofed building. He turned the ignition off and sat in the car quietly, not hearing the world outside the silence that encased him. This didn't even feel real to him. This was all just a horrible twisted life like dream and he was going to wake up any minute.

There was a light tap on his window that drew his attention, his dull cloudly dark blue eyes glanced up over the edge of his fedora at the short blond bent in front of his window with a similar pained expression. He nodded shortly, pulling the key from the car, unbuckling himself and climbing out of the well cared for automobile. The blond teen stood straight as he got out, a thin arm wrapping around his chest tightly before leading him to the building. They met an older blond at the doors, taking James' hand as well, while all three walked in together. A small petite red headed women walked up with a smile that was way too bright, so much that it made James glower a little bit, but he politely engaged in conversation, confirming that he was Mr. Egbert, and yes thank you for your kind words.

After a moment the two blonds that were accompanying him tugged him away to go upstairs. They took their jackets off and hung them up, leaving James to keep his on before they followed the little signs with the words "John Egbert Funeral Room C" to their designated place. It was early, the two blonds started setting up the compiled pots and vases of flowers, picture displaces, and a movie montage in the back of the room. While this happened James took a seat in the small love seat sat in the front row, in perfect view of the casket, dark oak with silver furnishings. 

He felt so numb, empty. It was such an odd feeling to have, staring at the open casket that held the neatly placed body of his now deceased son. The funeral home had that odd floral yet sterile smell, along with that empty sound that was brought on by them being the only ones there. He could have sworn the red head from before came back and said something about coffee and snacks but he couldn't quiet be for sure. That was till a small white Styrofoam cup was placed in his hand with black steaming liquid. He looked up slowly, almost like he was unaware that this was really happening, giving a small nod to the older man as he gave him a weak smile before going back to helping his little brother.

Soon people were starting to show up. Classmates, co-workers, teachers, his boss, some neighborhood kids he didn't quiet know. James struggled to at least pull a slight smile as he greeted those who walked up and introduced themselves to him. He was well aware of what they were saying, giving their condolences and their sympathy to the older man that had just lost his seventeen year old son, but he didn't hear an single word of anything. After a while people became weary of him when his responses became too automatic and monotone, so the Strider brothers stepped in to talk to those who wished to convey they're deepest respects to the grieving father.

It went on like this for a couple hours, people walking up to him, saying things he didn't quiet hear, people walking up to the casket to look over the preserved form of their friend, student, and classmate. It was soon dark and everyone started to leave, once again leaving the three men that had been there way earlier then everyone else. James had not been up to the casket yet, he didn't want to really go up there, it would make this too official for him. He had stayed seated on the love seat halfway through the visitations and was soon flanked by the two blonds, the older of which pulled him into a hug. His movements were a bit of an autopilot movement as he wrapped and arm around Dirk's thin waist, resting his jaw on his shoulder, not caring as his fedora was knocked crooked on his head. He felt Dave's hand on his back rubbing in circles as he tightened his grip around the eldest Strider. 

Before long Dirk gently shifted and moved James away, saying something that he didn't quiet catch as they both stood up and walked over to the casket. James watched on quietly as Dave reached into the casket to touch John's and or his face, he wasn't for sure. The heartfelt sob that broke through the numbing silence that had been suffocating him since he had arrived was heart breaking. He watched the youngest blond curl around into his brother's chest, shoulders shaking as he sobbed. _It's not fair! It's just not fair!_ He could hear Dave cry as he clung to his brother's shirt. Dirk remained as calm as he could as he held his little bro, petting his hair and hugging his shoulders tightly as they shook. 

After a while Dirk pulled Dave away from the casket to go sit back down. It was then James had finally stood up. The walk to the casket was way too long in his minds eye, but something caught in his chest when he finally made it to its side. He glanced down at his son, dressed in his favourite green slim suit that James had bought him for Prom that was supposed to be later this year. He looked so much like he was sleeping, rather then being gone from the world entirely. He stared quietly, tears slowly starting to stream down his face unnoticed as he carefully reached up and pulled off his hat, turning it in his hands for a moment before carefully setting it over the neatly folded hands of his son. 

His hands shook a little as he gently ran his fingers over the pressed lapels of the green suit coat, straightens the tie that was already perfectly straightened before he reached up and brushed his fingers over his jaw. It was startling how cold his skin was, how real it felt to realize that his son was gone, no longer full of life and happiness that he was known for. It was going to be so hard for James to carrying on with out seeing Johns bright shining smile everyday before he went to school, or his hugs, and carefully thought out pranks after the fact. He didn't know how he was going to be able to survive with out him. 

John was all that he really had and now he was gone too.


End file.
